Dreaming is hard. Taking action towards a dream can sometimes be a slow process. This is a blog that I started as one of the baby steps to my dream of becoming a writer and eventually a published author. Things happen. Life gets in the way. But today. I am re-committing to my dream and to this blog. I have a hugely busy week ahead, but one of my action items is: blog.
Be encouraged! You CAN do it!
Wednesday, October 16, 2013
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Becky Taylor's Spring Break Contest
Becky Taylor is having a fabulous contest over at her blog here, and you have the chance to win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Card! That will buy a lot of great books! Enter before March 22!
Rejecting Rejection
After reading a snarky reply to a form rejection letter sent to an agent recently on Janet Reid’s Blog, it got me thinking about rejection. The person writes back to inform the agent that this rejection is one that she will regret. In this person’s attempt to reject rejection, he or she ended up sounding less confident. A snarky reply just isn’t warranted to a rejection of any kind especially when you are confident in your work.
In any life, but especially in the writing life, people face rejection. Rejection is just an ugly concept. Rejection is hard, but it doesn’t have to be as hard as I sometimes make it. Now it may seem as if a good way to ease the intial pain is to senda mean reply to see if you can hurt the agent or editior or ex-boyfriend in some way, but guess what? You probably can't. And even if you do manage to sting a few feelings, that pain is temporary for them and could still be long term for you because now YOU are the person who sent a mean email or letter or cow heart in a box!
I have decided to take a different approach to rejection. I am rejecting rejection by embracing it. I am accepting that all I have control over is my part, and the rest of it, I will just have to trust that my part will be enough. And if at the end of my life, my part has not been enough, then I will just have to trust that it may have been worth something or maybe it wasn’t, but at least I tried, I took the risk, and I faced the rejection.
Because the thing is, you do not have to write if you do not want to. And if you do have to write because you just have to get from all of that from the inside of you to outside of you, then you do not have to show it to anyone. But if you really want to show it to other people, you can, and then at that moment, it is out of your control.
Now your part has ended for the moment, and someone else’s part has begun. You now have to make a new decision. Will accept what is being offered back to you? Will you ignore it? Will your react to it with snarky comments and resentment? Will you embrace it for what it is? I have done all of these things and more, but remember you only have your part, the writing, the decision about feedback, and the cycle begins again.
I know that it is hard to try to only control your part because this part is so deep and intimate and so dearly held in your heart, and to have that part of you rejected hurts! It just does, but the choice to bury it and quit will hurt more, at least it did to me. So embrace the rejection as a valuable part of the writing life that is there to build you up and not to tear you down. That seems like a lie, but I don’t think it is.
Embrace your part—creating and accepting!
In any life, but especially in the writing life, people face rejection. Rejection is just an ugly concept. Rejection is hard, but it doesn’t have to be as hard as I sometimes make it. Now it may seem as if a good way to ease the intial pain is to senda mean reply to see if you can hurt the agent or editior or ex-boyfriend in some way, but guess what? You probably can't. And even if you do manage to sting a few feelings, that pain is temporary for them and could still be long term for you because now YOU are the person who sent a mean email or letter or cow heart in a box!
I have decided to take a different approach to rejection. I am rejecting rejection by embracing it. I am accepting that all I have control over is my part, and the rest of it, I will just have to trust that my part will be enough. And if at the end of my life, my part has not been enough, then I will just have to trust that it may have been worth something or maybe it wasn’t, but at least I tried, I took the risk, and I faced the rejection.
Because the thing is, you do not have to write if you do not want to. And if you do have to write because you just have to get from all of that from the inside of you to outside of you, then you do not have to show it to anyone. But if you really want to show it to other people, you can, and then at that moment, it is out of your control.
Now your part has ended for the moment, and someone else’s part has begun. You now have to make a new decision. Will accept what is being offered back to you? Will you ignore it? Will your react to it with snarky comments and resentment? Will you embrace it for what it is? I have done all of these things and more, but remember you only have your part, the writing, the decision about feedback, and the cycle begins again.
I know that it is hard to try to only control your part because this part is so deep and intimate and so dearly held in your heart, and to have that part of you rejected hurts! It just does, but the choice to bury it and quit will hurt more, at least it did to me. So embrace the rejection as a valuable part of the writing life that is there to build you up and not to tear you down. That seems like a lie, but I don’t think it is.
Embrace your part—creating and accepting!
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
What do you want?
Getting clear about what you want: Admitting you have the desire to write (or sing, crochet, open a pet shop or whatever desires live deep in your heart)
The first step on my journey was admitting that I wanted something different than the life my choices had created. My life isn’t bad. In fact, it is far from it. I am so blessed and grateful for all that I have, but there also came a point when I had to admit to myself that I had buried a lot of my desires out of fear. When I was finally able to admit to myself that I had desires that I had been long out of touch with, I had to figure out what they were. This may not be a problem that many of you have, but if it is, these are some questions that helped me discover my desires and therefore helped me set my new goals.
1. What would you do if you could do anything? Another popular way of putting this is, “What would you do if you knew you could not fail?”
2. What would you absolutely NOT want to do?
The first question was hard for me, but once I was able to be honest with myself, I was able to discover some interests I had. The second question was a little easier for me.
The good news is if you want to do something, you can. You absolutely can. That doesn’t mean that it won’t be hard, but it just takes one step and then another. The first step is becoming clear about what you want.
One of the things I want to do in life is to write, and if you want to write, guess what? You get to! I get to! Many people get to skip this step because life hasn’t buried their desires, but for me, admitting I what I wanted was the first step.
The first step on my journey was admitting that I wanted something different than the life my choices had created. My life isn’t bad. In fact, it is far from it. I am so blessed and grateful for all that I have, but there also came a point when I had to admit to myself that I had buried a lot of my desires out of fear. When I was finally able to admit to myself that I had desires that I had been long out of touch with, I had to figure out what they were. This may not be a problem that many of you have, but if it is, these are some questions that helped me discover my desires and therefore helped me set my new goals.
1. What would you do if you could do anything? Another popular way of putting this is, “What would you do if you knew you could not fail?”
2. What would you absolutely NOT want to do?
The first question was hard for me, but once I was able to be honest with myself, I was able to discover some interests I had. The second question was a little easier for me.
The good news is if you want to do something, you can. You absolutely can. That doesn’t mean that it won’t be hard, but it just takes one step and then another. The first step is becoming clear about what you want.
One of the things I want to do in life is to write, and if you want to write, guess what? You get to! I get to! Many people get to skip this step because life hasn’t buried their desires, but for me, admitting I what I wanted was the first step.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Hello, World. I'm new.
Why, Hello, Writing and Reading World! I’m Charlotte, and I am new. Thank you for stopping by.
Last week, I was participating in an #askagent session on twitter, and it was so helpful. (And, can I just say, agents are so generous with their time do the #askagent sessions.) The question of how much web presence an aspiring author should have came up, and it was suggested that some agents like to see a blog and even some information about your work in progress/manuscript. (To be clear, just a little snippet of information about your manuscript and NOT YOUR MANUSCRIPT) This information gave me pause because I wasn’t ready.
So far I have been participating on twitter, but my presence on the interwebz is, well, not great. In an effort to participate more fully in this wonderful world of writers and readers, I am going to blog! My goal is to write about setting and achieving goals as well as my journey as an aspiring writer. You may also find the occasional post about my life as a librarian.
So welcome to the Charlotte A. Paige Project, and I am so glad you are here.
Next post: Getting Clear on What You Want!
Last week, I was participating in an #askagent session on twitter, and it was so helpful. (And, can I just say, agents are so generous with their time do the #askagent sessions.) The question of how much web presence an aspiring author should have came up, and it was suggested that some agents like to see a blog and even some information about your work in progress/manuscript. (To be clear, just a little snippet of information about your manuscript and NOT YOUR MANUSCRIPT) This information gave me pause because I wasn’t ready.
So far I have been participating on twitter, but my presence on the interwebz is, well, not great. In an effort to participate more fully in this wonderful world of writers and readers, I am going to blog! My goal is to write about setting and achieving goals as well as my journey as an aspiring writer. You may also find the occasional post about my life as a librarian.
So welcome to the Charlotte A. Paige Project, and I am so glad you are here.
Next post: Getting Clear on What You Want!
Thursday, October 28, 2010
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